Thursday, August 23, 2007

Strike while the Irony is hot

So as my previous post mentioned, I have been an LDS member for four weeks now. In that time I have noticed a few things I find very ironic. The first is that to get into temples you need a temple recomend, which is now being made into a barcode. Price check on worthiness, price check on worthiness. God loves all of his creations, especially member number 101110110. Oh Mr. Smith I am sorry your salvation was declined please try again. Ladies and gentlemen we regret to inform you, but today no one will achieve salvation, our computers are down. No, perhaps it would be more apropos to say, now boarding temple recommends A-Smith, A-Smith. What if other religions did this? Catholic: I'm sorry sir I need to see your ID before you can go see father O'Malley. No Card No Confession. Pentecostal: He has a Card Brethren! Hallelujiah for He is Saved! Oh, Ma'am we don't actually fully scan cards here we only look at them. Praise the Lord! Unitarian: No mater who you are or where you are in live's journey, you are welcome here--As long as you have your card to prove it.
I can see this causing problems on wedding days. Tuxedo--Check. Bride--Check, Flowers, Ring --Check, ah crap! I left my card in my other pants! :( Or hmm, my card isn't registering it must be the High powered Tessla Coil I keep in my pocket. Do you think the church will let such things SLIDE ? If it gets stolen, is it swipped? Is this card going to be like a spiritual Totin' Chip? As long as I still have my card I am good, but I lose a corner each time I am bad. When there are no more corners then the excamunicating beat down begins? Did you ever imagine that our mortal existance might be like a Giant library for souls? Hi I am going to use my card and check out a John Boom. I'll have him back to ya in 76 years or so. Yeah Yeah that's fine, just make sure you return him in one piece otherwise there will be a fine.

Ever so Sorry. I just thought the above was rather funny. Please don't disown me yet!

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