A bit of an elaboration...

So I have been asked to elaborate upon my previous post. If you look carefully in the background is a romantic duck pond. If closer you looked you might actually see that the wonderous thing I am wrapped around, is in fact a girl! Now this is no ordinary girl, this is a girl to put all other girls to shame! Now a claim so adacious needs backing. The following is what I like to call, THE LIST. I have known her less than 1 month and we have more than 158 things in common! Behold! THE LIST!

number Charla John
1 skydiving on 21st birthday skydiving on 22 birthday
2 recreation store scout camp
3 hiking hiking
4 summer birthday summer birthday
5 want to do scuba has done scuba
6 bagpipes bagpipes
7 classical 89 classical 89
8 lds lds
9 democrat democrat
10 npr npr
11 opera opera
12 classical classical
13 musical experience musical experience
14 taugh self piano taught self clarinet
15 Screwdriver in eye Shout in eye
16 Likes Astronomy Likes Astronomy
17 Works a the Ott Works a the Ott
18 In favor of GLBT rights In favor of GLBT rights
19 sings sorta sings
20 Likes Math LIKES Math
21 Tells jokes Tells jokes
22 Lotsa random knowledge Lotsa random knowledge
23 Off the beaten path Off the beaten path
24 wears glasses needs glasses
25 reason for favorite color reason for favorite color
26 Brown hair Brown hair
27 Green eyes Green eyes
28 Tall Tall
29 Loves to read Loves to read
30 Curiosity about the world Curiosity about the world
31 Wants to get into scouts Big scouter
32 Life is Precious Life is Precious
33 Spirit of the Law Spirit of the Law
34 Italian food Italian food
35 Second row pew Second row pew
36 Enjoys learning Enjoys learning
37 Actually learns stuff in church Actually learns stuff in church
38 Avoided drivers license as long as possible Still doesn't have drivers license
39 depression history depression history
40 Money is evil but necessary Money is evil but necessary
41 Been to Atlantic and Pacific Been to Atlantic and Pacific
42 Swam with dolphins nearby Swam with dolphins nearby
43 Love for animals Love for animals
44 Dog person Dog person
45 Foot-in-Mouth Disease Foot-in-Mouth Disease
46 Global Warming Global Warming
47 Science majors Science majors
48 Math minor Math major
49 Math Factor Member Math Factor VP
50 Works hard for everything she has Works hard for everything he has
51 Feelings on close-mindedness Feelings on close-mindedness
52 Has actually written senators Has actually written senators
53 Swing Swing
54 Jazz Jazz
55 Able to notice the Hand of God in life Able to notice the Hand of God in life
56 Likes MST3K Likes MST3K
57 Princess Bride movie Princess Bride movie
58 Black scriptures Black scriptures
59 gold writing gold writing
60 two books two books
61 Montessori schools Montessori schools
62 Likes definitions and origins of words Likes definitions and origins of words
63 Symbolism Symbolism
64 Hairy knuckles Hairy knuckles
65 Soft Skin on hands Soft Skin on hands
66 Cookie Dough Ice Cream! Cookie Dough Ice Cream!
67 Doesn't like pickles Doesn't like pickles
68 Like Chess Like Chess
69 Enoys a good ballet Enoys a good ballet
70 Thoughts on Silence Thoughts on Silence
71 Doesn't really like tv Doesn't really like tv
72 gouda cheese gouda cheese
73 Wants someone to do the dishes Wants to do the dishes.
74 Loves John favorite cheese is Charla
75 Likes Winter Likes Winter
76 Previous Boyfriend Bipolar Previous Girl Friend Bipolar
77 Wants to have fun while working Wants to work for fun.
78 Sugar Bagel Cream cheese beagle
79 Likes fresh veggies Likes fresh veggies
80 Some martial arts Some martial arts
81 minimal jewelry minimal jewelry
82 Mothers similar in stature Mothers similar in stature
83 Wants to travel Wants to travel
84 Credit cards are evil Credit cards are evil
85 Help others Help others
86 competitive competitive
87 stratego stratego
88 drinks lots of water drinks lots of water
89 Life List Life List
90 Hawaii Hawaii
91 Trembling Trembling
92 favorite eye (right) favorite eye (right)
93 One set of deceased grandparents One set of deceased grandparents
94 Dead Poet's Society Dead Poet's Society
95 Not a cat person Not a cat person
96 homestarrunner homestarrunner
97 dontopedologists dontopedologists
98 former warts former warts
99 Death to chick flicks Death to chick flicks
100 Not so much horror films Not so much horror films
101 Feel good movies cool when not trying too hard to provoke emotions Feel good movies cool when not trying too hard to provoke emotions
102 Science freaking rules Science freaking rules
103 Strives for potential Strives for potential
104 Rollerfreaking Coasters!! Amen!
105 Loves the Ocean not nearly as much as John, but still a lot! Loves the Ocean
106 Loves animals Loves animals
107 Loves plants Loves plants
108 Like a small reception Like a small reception
109 know too many people know too many people
110 it's okay because we want cool gifts it's okay because we want cool gifts
111 To feel better does physics To feel better does math
112 Cedar Point Cedar Point
113 RUFUS RUFUS
114 Likes the smell of funny Smells funny
115 Goof Ball Goof Ball^2
116 Princess Bride book Princess Bride book
117 Lists for everything Occaisional List fix
118 Lists for Companion Lists for Companion
119 Better Golfer than Bowler Better Golfer than Bowler
120 Grapefuit sucks Grapefuit sucks
121 Pizza freaking rules Pizza freaking rules
122 Floggin Molly Floggin Molly
123 Love Love
124 Simplicity Simplicity
125 Born in Month of Parents anniversary both 26 years Born in Month of Parents anniversary both 26 years
126 Forgetful Forgetful
127 Environmentalist Environmentalist
128 Hates driving Hates driving
129 We love cereal We love cereal
130 Neither of us wear a ton of jewelery Neither of us wear a ton of jewelery
131 Neither of us are girly Neither of us are girly
132 Stingy (in a good way) Stingy (in a good way)
133 Willing to change if there's a problem Willing to change if there's a problem
134 Neither of us want the other to change Neither of us want the other to change
135 Carry on a conversation coherently about everything Carry on a conversation coherently about everything
136 Not-so-much bird pets Not-so-much bird pets
137 Loves just sitting in nature and watching Loves just sitting in nature and watching
138 Was present when animals were scared away with unusual means (hamburger, aflack) Was present when animals were scared away with unusual means (hamburger, aflack)
139 Likes watching birds take off and land Likes watching birds take off and land
140 Easily entertained Easily entertained
141 Astro-Acapella! Astro-Acapella!
142 Has been the tagalong goose Has been the tagalong goose
143 Likes Tagalongs Likes Tagalongs
144 Likes Samoas Likes Samoas
145 Loves education Loves education
146 Plans on lots of grad school Plans on lots of grad school
147 Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles
148 Legos Legos
149 Noses fit Noses fit
150 Played Power Rangers Played Power Rangers
151 Integration Bee Integration Bee
152 Finds John extremely attractive Finds Charla extremely attractive
153 Very Smart Very Smart
154 Lived in a yellow house Lived in a yellow house
155 Love watching the clouds move Love watching the clouds move
156 Love watching each other Love watching each other
157 Loves fresh herbs Loves fresh herbs
158 Likes gardening Likes gardening with limited zeal

There are a couple I would like to especially point out:21, 22,127 and 151! Heaven. She tells jokes. She has as much random knowledge as I do! She's a total environmental nut :) AND she competes in calculus competitions with me!
Math, puns, trivia, environementalist, I am the luckiest guy in the world! Clearly you should all stayed tuned, a word with gianormous capital "M" should be in the works soon!

Oh and before I go, I should also point out as exhibited by the previous post, she's also gorgeous too! Well I hope this was enough of an elaboration. Till next time, take luck.

Totally the sweetest girl!

Yea!!

Sweet!

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Qoute of the days

"Congratulations, your having a baby! Do you know what its name will be yet?"
" No we're not going to worry about little details like that!"

Once Upon a Post

Once upon a post, I questioned a statement, and stated a question. Finding no answer the thought was left to drift upon the wind. But now, a bout with geologic thermodynamics has brought it back.





Life is





There is is again, that unpunctuated mystery of the grand cosmic scheme of things. We will make our round to it once again, but first, we will start with the geology.





Earth is alive. This idea is called the Gaia Hypothesis. It was developed in 1978 and the argument is as follows. Life is a property that makes possible growth, cycling of nutrients, adaptation to surroundings, and enables reproduction. Growth-a process of development. Ok let's see. Earth started as a cloud of dust. It developed into a molten solid. From this water and land developed. Life. Air, oxygen, plants, etc soon followed (give or take a few billion). Though it may not have necessarily gotten bigger Earth has grown. Earth is not the same as it was when it first started, it has developed significantly since. Ergo, growth.


Ah but what about the cycling of nutrients--Carbon cycle, nitrogen cycle, phosphorus cycle, sulfur, nitrogen, water cycle, rock cycle--Earth recycles (so remind me again why aren't we?)!


Ok, but is Earth adapting? Yes. During the period nearly 2 billion years ago life developed a taste for a highly toxic substance known as oxygen. So much of it was released, so quickly it actually rusted the entirety of our planet.

http://www.emc.maricopa.edu/faculty/farabee/BIOBK/mich03.gif

Exhibit A. A chunk of alternating rusted and non-rusted Iron. The only explaination for this is oxygen and lots of it, which killed of the creatures who made it leaving a period where there wasn't as much leading to another period of developement where we as life forms produced it again making it red again then having it build up and kill us repeating for a few million years until Earth finally adapted reached a suitable mixture of both and has never looked back. Oxygen now consists of 21% of the composition of Earth's air. Yet Earth has not shut down, it has not ceased functioning even though a major component of its composition Carbon dioxide is now a trace compound. Nor did it shut off when a formerlly trace element such as oxygen now dominates the scene. No. Earth has adapted, and continues to exist in its new role as an oxygen rich carbon poor planet. It exists just as life still exists despite the cataclysmic changes.
Growth, Check! Nutrient Cycling, Check!, Adaptation, Check! So far so good, but what about reproduction? Check! The moon. Earth's moon is composed of the same materials as Earth. It is a weird way of thinking about it, but our moon is a budding of the mother planet Earth. I will freely admit, Earth is not a life form as we are used to thinking of them, but she is alive nonetheless. By definition she meets every criterion for life. She is a single cell of enormous proportions and we are the mitochondria and organelles that make her go.

[ If instead you would prefer a somewhat more religious argument, then consider this, How many cultures have personafied her? She is "Mother Earth" and "Gaia" to name just two. For those of you who are of the LDS persuasion peruse the Book of Moses chapter 7 or so. Admittedly, these claims do not prove that Earth is alive, but it does show that it is at least a very old idea that has been pased around before.]

If you will but permit me, I am going to take the claim that, Earth really is a form of life, as an axiom, and for kicks and giggles, let us see what develops if we do. We have developed axiom 1, Earth can be thought of as something living. Something living composed of smaller individual units who are themselves living, whose interactions make up the whole. There is another example that also follows this pattern. Us. We too are large organisms existing because of the contributions of literally trillions of smaller living wholes. Ahh!! My brain hurts tiny wholes making up the big wholes filling in the holes. This post is getting as bad THIS one. I need to go get something to eat. You should too.

Munch ...munch...munch.

Ah good! You're back! Consider what just happened there. You decided that you would uncork yourself from your formerly seated position. Stroll over to your designated food source. Reach out, open it or buy it. Make it. Eat it. And now you are enjoying your contented post consumption bliss. I must say, a very well planned action. But you must admit, it was pretty spontaneous too, just getting up like that and eating spur of the moment. There aren't too many laws of the US government that at precisely X:03 must grab something to eat. It was your own free will that compelled you to do that. But, and this one is the kicker, let's go a step further. What were your cells doing? One cell gets a signal from another, its just a faint signal an increase in this ion triggering a release of that compound. That's no big deal says that cell I make this every day. Another day, another compound. I don't know why I do this. I don't know where it goes. I just secrete this. I just do what I'm told. That substance made by Stan over in cubical 127365 is sent to the muscles. Joe down the lane got a letter from some cell named Stan it says flex. Ok says Joe, I'll flex. Martha, Billy, Roberta all got similar messages. Some from Stan, some from all of the others over in the neuron division. They go about doing their thing and the leg muscles flex and extend. But there are a few trouble makers. Those clowns over in adductor longus had a late night last night and just aren't up to contracting. That's cool. They can choose to do that. They have just as much free will as you or I, but what happens if they do? Your leg cramps up, your ability to complete your plan is hindered--you have a cramp. Now at this juncture you have several options. You can go on painfully, you still get food, it hurt, but you have forced you will upon the leg. Food comes and happiness resumes. You could try to work with the fellas in adductor longus cell block B reach a compromise after some rubbing and continue when they choose to cooperate. You could change your plans and not go get food. You could have someone else help you and have them go get food. The food was attained. Happiness achieved, but how did it happen?

What would happen if we took this analogy and instead applied it to religion? The body is God. The freewill of God is our small subtle command the ion that told stan to secrete an extra potassium. Stan's part was but a small one. Individually Stan may not have been needed. He probably could have done something else. But what if every cell acted this way? Could anything get done? Billions of cells a day die. Some die horrible deaths, some die after their energy stores wear out quitely in passing, but everyone of them had a purpose, played a part. The actions of one affect the actions of another. Yet, if we will choose to follow the plan, great food, new stores of glycogen, and glucogone await us all. Because of one cramp no one is willing to amputate the leg, but what about continous pain?

Hmm, our example holds on so many levels. We are the cells of God, his conscience is a will that will lead us to great rewards. But why must the analogy stop? Could not Earth be the single cell of the universe as a whole? Are not the atoms the cells held sway by the organelles.

Hamlet once said that he could hold himself the master of a nutshell and consider himself content. I am of the LDS faith. My faith says that when we die we too will become Gods. Perhaps in death the realization comes that in a way we already are. Why must we be good, do good? Because if we are not concerned for the health of our cells, the health of our subjects we too may die! If we are but the cells of a great and grand God, how very inspiring to note that perhaps if we do not follow his will we are the cancers of God, If my hairbrained ideas hold true sin may literally be the death of God! In a way it was. Christ died for our sins! Maybe instead, he died BECAUSE of them! Sobering thoughts, but we are not done, not yet. What is this property of life, this property that allows us to grow, develop, change, adapt, reproduce and seek happiness? What if this property is an aspect of the Holy Ghost? We showed earlier that the Holy Ghost stems from an integral taken over our entire lives--That would count all of our cells that we have ever had, what if his power comes from the power of life even the tiniest life smaller than a cell, and yet everywhere at once. If the power of the Holy Ghost is intimately tied in with life, it would explain why the Holy Ghost has so many aspects of a heavenly mother. Not because it IS the heavenly mother, but because it is the force of life, a force strongly in tune in mothers.

Good ideas, the lot of them, but how do I test it? And where did that bit about thermodynamics come in how does that relate? Well the ideas for this post stemmed from the conservation of energy, but before I tackle that, I am going to need to do a bit more reading. More posts to come. I hope you enjoy. Good luck! Good night.

More Equations of the Universe

First an addendum. I have said in the past that God is light. This cannot wholey be true, for God said "let there be light, and there was!" If God IS light it is somewhat pathological for God to say "let there be me, and I was!" But, because God is able to command light he must be greater than or equal to light. This is good news for us because this means our faith need not be canceled out, our faith may very well be infinite.


But enough of that. Today's post is a graph. First we shall define our axes. Let one axis be God's choices, his optimal plan for us. We will let the other axis be our choices, our response to His plan. Ah but which will be the orthogonal and which will be the absyssa (Y, and X respectively)? The answer is simple. God is no respector of persons, for He is God. God's choice is independant of ours. However, our choice depends on what God wants for us. And since Y depends upon X, we are dependent upon God, our responses will the Y values, God will be the X values.


Now consider that God cannot make a choice that would go against God. It would violate all trust in him, the Universe would no longer obey him. He would cease to be God. Therefore, in the freightening parlance of math, God's choices may be expressed as a semistable invariant line through Y=0 with a critical point at X=0. What!?


In simple terms, it means God's choices will always lead toward what is good. They will always increase. How can they not? He is God. Or, another way of looking at it is if God is running the Universe, wouldn't his choices be what we observe as time?" Ah! I see! So it must always be increasing.
But what about our choices? We have the option of following God, or of not following him. If we did not have this option, then we would have no freewill, there would be no sin--because we would be forced to commit it and therefore unable to stop it and therefore not a sin. Moreover, and more importantly if we did not have a choice to go against what God has willed for us there could be no dK term, no term of changes we have made in our lives. If dK=0 our salvation too goes to 0. Thus, we are allowed to either follow the will of God, or to go against it. We will denote a following of God's will as an increasing ammount, and a divergence of God's will will be denoted by a negative sign. I also propose that at the instant that we are born we have not yet had the ability to make a choice our graph must be at zero. No choices means that we cannot have yet chosen to follow ours, or God's will. If we put all of these things together and connect the paths that our resultant vectors must follow, we will quickly come up with a graph that looks a bit like this.

How do we know it looks like this? We'll start with Christ. Did Christ ever choose a path that was not in accordance with his father's will? No. He resisted the Devil, he resisted temptation, he resisted the world. This means that every choice that Christ made was what his father wanted. Christ thus chose the optimal path. His slope is 1-1. Y=X. Careful examination shows that nowhere else can we have as steep a graph as that of Christ's. Eventually even the paths of the angels will approximate that of Christ's.

At this juncture, contrast the path of Christ with that of the Devil. If the Devil would but follow the path laidout for him, it is possible that even he could return to God, the father. Since he does not, this must mean that the devil is opposing God at every step. At every point in life the Devil does that which will lead away from God. Thus his slope is -1. His line is Y=-X, the perpendicular line to that of Christ's. Thus the Devil is the opposite and reciprocal of Christ. e.g. the Antichrist. The Devil's path will take you farthest from God fastest. Our Graph seems to tell us what has already been said. There are but two churches, the one that will lead you toward God. And the one that will lead you away from Him.

Ah, but what happens at the point where Y=X=0? It also happens to be the point where Y=-X=0. Wait what? There is somepoint where the Devil was an equal to Christ? That point is at the origin. The Begining. Time = 0. God has not yet created us, and at that point Christ=Devil=God. They are together. They have not yet diverged. Satan has not yet offered up his plan, before then they were one. After, the path of one leads to light, the path of the other leads into darkness.

So we have seen what happens after time =0. We are offered two choices--Follow God and Christ, or follow the Devil away from God and Christ. But hold on, if we consider only what happens where X is positive we are not getting the full picture. Where X is positive represents only quadrants I and IV. We missing fully half of the graph! But time =0 is the earliest we can possibly exist. Once my mind is developed I can then make choices. Once this happens we start our clock and begin at time = 0. But as we have said, God is independant of our actions (Though that statement itself is interesting. Is God's plan really independant of our plan? Is it even possible to ask how would God's plan change if we weren't here? We have the choice of commiting suicide. We have shown previously that if one does commit suicide TL is cut short, and the ultimate goal of S-Salvation is reduced. Thus even though suicide is an option we are probably safe in assuming that it is not an option encouraged by God, and thus probably not a part of his plan. But, because we do have the power to commit such an act, and because the universe has not appeared to stop when people do commit suicide this suggests that even though God has a plan for us, if we choose not to follow it it is not grossly dissarrayed. Since his plan still comes to completion with or without us, it must be independant of us even though we may have an enormous part in it. We may even be able to shape it ala prayer. However for now we will assume independence even if a sort of strange non-linear self intwined parallel independence whatever that means. I think what I mean by that is that God has a back up plan. We are a part of his plan, but if we choose not to follow it it is a simple matter of going to plan B. I think the number of plans God has is proportional to our faith in him. The greater our faith in Him the fewer the number of backup plans and the greater his faith in us. Hence, Christ whom God had infinite faith required no back up plans. However, in science we often see numerous inventions developed simultaneously. Myriads of discoveries independently corroborated and often each with a great deal of "accident" leading up to it. Hundreds of miles apart similar ideas emerge in almost perfect unison. From supernovas, to calculus, Discovery of Mendell's paper on genetics, development of the telephone, Bronsed and Lowry, Arrhenius, and Lewis all coming up with similar definitions of acids and bases weeks apart. It happens quite alot. My interpretation of these events are that they are evidence of God having a backup plan. Thus God is able to know a result long before, if maybe not an individual. Even though he knows quite intimately the individuals involved. Thus God's plan IS independent of our actions, albeit only sort of.) Returning to the original thread of our argument. If God's plan is truly indepent of our actions, and we will assume that it is, he created much of the world without us, we will therefore assume that he can function without us. This means that God is still making choices long before we enter the scene. This means that quadrants II and III exist! This strongly implies that there is a premortal existance. If we take this to be the case it would explain where the Angels written of in the Bible came from. they are simply those who were created before we were living on a higher plane whose paths take them ito our neighborhood of existence. Moreover, observe the bottom half of our graph from the point on the X axis (-1,0) traveling anticlockwise until arriving at the line Y=-X one quickly notices that this represents one third of a heavenly host lost to the darkness with their leader being the one who opposed God at every step. We also note that every trajectory of our premortal existances will converge eventually with the path that Christ set out for us, or with that of the Devil!

Ah, but can I relate any of this to the equations I have thus demonstrated? Well, consider this. Let's see what would happen if I suggested that Salvation (S) was really our slope. S=dY/dX where dY we said was our choices. The terms that we have control over in my previous equations are the F,E, dK, & Tl terms. We have control over our faith, the energy we devote to others, the things we overcome, and the life we lead. God has control over C^2Te. Light and by it the universe and his plan for us and what is expected of us. S=(FETldK)/(C^2Te)=dY/dX and sure enough we have chosen our choices to represent the Y axis, with God's choice to be the X. Since God has a plan for us, if he did not, why then should Christ have to die? If there is no plan why is there order? Why do things happen the way they do? If there is no plan, then why are we here? If there is no plan, nothing to come later, why is there pain, especially emotional pain? Shouldn't that have evolved out by now? Yet if there is something to come is not pain but a training ground for what is yet to come? I claim there IS a plan. If there is a plan Te =/= 0 which implies that dx =/= 0 which implies that on our graphs there should never be a point where there is a vertical tangent line. And indeed there isn't. There are places where we refuse to change and are equal to zero. The maximum change comes with infine E and dK or infinite love and helping ourselves and others change. At this stage we have become exactly what Christ has taught us, at this point we do become Christ like as our expression tells us. The other bit of speculation comes if one ponders what happens on the otherside of the asymtote? Is this really a phase diagram? Does it really repeat? Maybe it just so happens to be that our after life is really just another pre-mortal existance's begining? Perhaps there really are three kingdoms of heaven. This one is the heaven from the last one, the next one is the pre-life for the one following and on and on the cycle continues. This last bit is admitedly a bit of errant speculation and will require much more testing. But the ideas are interesting. On that note, for tonight I leave you. Good night! Good luck! Stay enlightened!

I hope you noticed....

Off to the right, in the little linky section--There is a link that says "Venture Crew." This is the link to the Steiner Venture Crew Homepage! You should all check it out. I am posting it as a place for past, present and future steiner staffers, or anyone else who is interested in venturing. Please feel free to post and visit frequently to keep track of what activities are going on. To check it out click here.

Hooray for the English Department!

Quantum Pants

Thanks to my friend Matt, I could not help but posting this link. Oh yeah! Quantum Pants! Both formal and casual duality!

My Stand Up Comedy Debut

So Yesterday, January 18th 2008, I successfully performed in my stand up comedy debut. I pulled of my routine flawlessly, except the one time in my life where I publicly NEED to lick my elbow, I couldn't do it. I also could not remember the word Alzheimers. I didn't win. I did get 4th place though. ANd the one who won needed a new transmission so life worked out well. I am still an excellent practicioner of dontopedology--The science of opening my mouth and sticking my foot in it. I said some really stupid things afterward that probably cost me, but as far as the performance itself, I got at least one laugh on every joke and had no complaints afterward. It went really well. And for viewing pleasure, just in case you missed my performance, here's a transcript (Sadly No YouTube links :(

"So I just applied for a job. In the interview they asked what special skills I had. I told them I can lick my nose, I can lick my elbow [It took me two tries] and I can poke my head through a hole the size of a quarter [pokes head]. Yea, sadly, I didn't get the job. It got outsourced to India. So I decided I would go to college and get me some more skills. My trip started with a visit to the councilors. They said I might even consider studying abroad. I said, "Broad Based Education, does that mean I can study GIRLS!?! And if I get to study a broad do I get to pick wich one?" I decided I would start with the place where all the action was. I went to Institute. Great classes there. Contrary to popular opinion Utah is actually a really diverse state. We have Mormons in red shirts, Mormons in blue shirts, and even Mormons in green shirts. When I first came here we had a choice of Four churches I could have gone to. The first ward, the second ward, or the singles ward. In those institute classes, We talked about morals--Roman Emporers have the most morals they are on the straight and Nero. We talked about drugs--Hiding opiates in your bicycle is considered drug pedalling. We even mentioned why people go to the gym--its to get their demons excercised. ya gotta be careful though if you don't pay your excorcist you may get repossessed. But the big thing they talked about in institute is Dating and Marriage. So, I got me a girl friend. She's a real looker. SHe's a girl with one eye, named Wanda, her other eye is named Fred. She was a pre-med major. She said she wanted to stay up all night studying anatomy with me. I got really excited about that, until I found out she really meant the book. I think she had OCD though. Everytime I told here she had obsessive compulsive dissorder she told me No she didn't she had CDO it is in alphabetical order that way. She also had a wooden leg, but sadly we broke it off. Too much drama--It was her minor. Her specialty was pantomime {I actually forgot to say that last line so the upcoming punchline died, but strangely enough people still laughed.} she just couldn't think outside of the box [mimed a glass box]. But her rendition of a chicken crossing the road---shear poultry in motion. Speaking of Poetry My English class was really great. Except the first day of class she was late she said she had to stop and change a satire. Later she told us that while reading romantic poetry we had to be very Thoreau. We read some really great books in that class though. Phone Book: the musical, the how to guide for Do it yourself Colonoscopies, Effective Parenting, by B. Spears with a foreward on how to entertain young boys by Michael Jackson. We even read a really good one "101 pranks you can play on the mob". But my favorite book was one that had action adventure, drama, excitment, mystery, intrigue, suspense and antidisestablismentarianism. The dictionary. It was reading the dictionary that got me my latest hobby, coming up with alternative definitions to well known words. One I came up with was an alternative definition for acupressure. Its means how to deal with pressing demands. The academy Awards is praising people for not being themselves. A bra is a fallout shelter, a topless beach is a place with no strings attached. I even found a recipe for baked Alaska while reading the dictionary. It told me to look under Global Warming. But the best definition was Absolute Zero. I had a hard time understanding what exactly absolute zero was, until I remembered that it was the grade I got in my math class. Speaking of math. Math was a good class. It was a little scary though. The first day someone passed out. We couldn't find a doctor, but fortunately the professor knew a parametric. After that he taught us about binary. I get it, I finally get binary. Bi means two so clearly a binary is two canaries duh! After that he taught us multivariable Roman Numeral calculus. Finding maximums were a little tricky. He liked giving us story problems. He gave us one about New York where we had to find the constant. I know whats constant in New York. Death and Taxis. Then he gave us one about a dog's eyesight. Everyone knows houndsight is 20/20 then we had to find how much the dog weighed 16 ounces per hound. But our professor was a little nerdy. He presented at a Star Trek convention. His speech was entitled finding Nemoy. He talked about fixing a car using spock plugs. Then he got off into the differences in various Star Wars Fighters, you know the X wings, the Y wings, he even had Chebacca's Wookie card. After math came physics. We talked about the opposite of pulleys pusheys. We even threw small metal musical instruments into water to discuss dampened harmonica motion. After physics came zoology. I learned that there is a special scientific name for a lazy kangaroo they call them pouch potatoes. The opposite of a bacteria is a fronteria. I learned what came after the tape worm, the Cdworm. And from my pre-med friends I learned about some various injuries people have survived from. The guy who fell into an upholstery machine is now fully re-covered. And the guy who backed into a meat processing plant got a little behind in his work. We also learned about aging. Did you know that uhm er what was that word oh yeah Alzheimer's is a lot like amnesia vu? You know you have forgot this before. And speaking of aging, if babies nurse, then what the heck is going on in a nursing home and how do I get me some!? Thank you Good night, I am going to practice a little comic relief and stop talking now."

Thunderous applause. And I was in the finals 4th place for that comedy routine. There you have it. I hope you enjoyed it and I also hope it was too crude or offensive for you tastes. Good night, good luck, may you be enlightened.

May I just say...

COMPUTERS ARE STUPID!!! Now that that is out I feel much better. So for 4 days now I have been trying to solve a problem. I finally gave up and went to the professor. Whereas it failed for 4 days consecutively, the second that I get the teacher it decides to work. Yay for Irony!

Sorry!

First an apology to my faithful readers. Last week's post about Afghanistan, Tasers, Ikea (coolest store ever) and bagpipes may have confused a few. Humorous yes, but the actual links you were looking for can be found here:

Afghanistan:
http://news.bbc.co.uk/2/hi/south_asia/7174294.stm

Taser:
http://www.metro.co.uk/weird/article.html?in_article_id=82876&in_page_id=2

Plastic Lenin Statue:
http://www.stuff.co.nz/4344635a10.html

And clicking the last two posts leads to why bagpipes are bad on the enviornment and the chap who spent a week at Ikea.

Remember: Fe-y is the Symbol for Irony!

So let me get this straight...Things are now so bad in Pakistan they are fleeing to Afghanistan for safety! Oy Vey! Click here.

Today's Three "What the?s" and a Zap Brought to you by....

This Guy!

That's right folks, by clicking this easy breezy simple little link, you too can own your very own IPOD? Taser combo!

The Fluffosophizer Returns: Equations of the Universe V

Honor thy mother and father (Exodus 20:12). But how does this fit
with what we know about S=FEdKTL/(C^2TE)? The Energy we devote to
others is a form of Love, and how can we love another if it does not
start at home? Moreover how can you have a high F(G) if you do not
honor your own parents? How can you change your life without
involving others? And how do you live life if you are not created?
Parents are inherent in every term in the numerator. They are a
fundamental part of the equation of salvation.

Thou shall not kill (20:13). If you loved something, why would
you kill it? The image of God is in all things(Paraphrasing Alma
30:40). God created all things, ergo killing something for no other
purpose than to kill--that is a serious slap in the face of God. If
you are doing that you are not showing love and admiration of His
creations, you are not honoring your father, you are requiring him to
create anew the life you have taken diminishing E the energy devoted
to others. You are playing with a sacred TL/TE ratio. Thou shall not
kill.

Thou shalt not commit adultery. If you do you are taking away energy
you should have been devoting to your spouse. You run the risk of
creating a child that will not be able to honor its parents. To have
an affair also involves lying to cover it up thereby increasing your
dK term. And lowering your F term because by having an affair,
commiting adultary, you, whether you admit it or not are saying that
you have no faith that your currect relationship will workout so I
should persue another.

Thou shalt not steal (20:15). Again this one goes back to the F term.
If you need something so bad as to steal it, you are really saying
that you don't trust God enough that if you really did need it he
would provide a means of achieving it. By stealing you are not
showing love and respect for your neighbor. And you are creating
negative energy terms within the E term.

Thou shalt not covet thy neighbors stuff (20:17). How can you love
your God, if you are wallowing in pity over the things you don't have?
By coveting you are spending your talents to no avail. If it were
meant to be that you needed such things then God will provide a way
for you to acquire them. Covetings are things dK is made of, the
wants and desires to be overcome in this life. Finally, if you are
coveting the things of your neighbor, how is it that you can love him,
and serve him? You will instead be swallowed by the envy of his
stuff. How can you love God with your heart, soul and mind, if part of
these are devoted to your neighbor's big screen TV?

Q.E.D though not at all aparent, nor obvious, the things God has
commanded us are indeed hidden within the equation of faith. But
there is a second part of the challenge I too must prove. In Matthew
Christ says that the teachings of the profits hang upon love as well.
But can they too be found in my equations?

We will start with the LDS Articles of Faith. 1. We believe in God
the Eternal Father and in his son, Jesus Christ and in the Holy Ghost.
Check F(G), F(S), and the Holy Ghost being separate from the three
comes about though calculus. The Holy Ghost if you recall is hidden
by the dK upon integrating a constant companion drops out of the
equation. If you look back at your life as a whole hidden beside you
at all times, often far too small for him to be see were the pices of
a higher dimensional constant companion. He is there, but he can only
be seen when your life as a whole is viewed in retrospect. Even
though his is small, he is there, and he can be felt.

2.We believe that men will be punished for their own sins, and not for
Adam's transgressions. Ah but adam had to sin for there to be
transgressions, thus there is a plan T(E), but we are allowed to chose
how we live our lives T(L). Thus there is also free will. For it is
our choice upon which we are graded.

3. By obedience to Christ all mankind may be saved, by obedience to
the laws and ordinances of the Gospel. A reaffirmation of the
importance of F(G) and of F(S).

4. Most important are First faith in Lord Jesus Christ (There's that
F(S) term again), second repentance (dK), third baptism by imersion
(carefully note the position of where God's plan T(E) is in the
equation, it is below the horizon of life and death. Baptism is the
journey across the divisor from the region of life we control into the
realm of God. If is not enough to catch but a glimpse of the world of
God, you must be fully immersed into it.), fourth the laying on of
hands for the gift of the Holy Ghost. The last one is tricky, but it
to is hidden in there. Where it mentions the Holy ghost, we should
probably suspect that we will need to again consider the integral
notation or are previous equation. once again incase you are lost,
the definition that we have been playing with stems from the idea that
the impact of our actions depends upon the quality and quantity of our
actions. We measured the quantity of our faith with the F
multipliers. We measured the quality by our works where our works
were defined F*d which though the postulates of Einstein morphed into
EdK*T/(C^2dT) without egregious loss of generality we have been
calling dT, the change in time, simply the time that we are expected
to live. If we solve for time, by rearranging we are left with dt/t=(FE/C^2*S)dK Integrating both sides we end up with Log T = (FE/C^2*S)K+H => T=e^H*e^(FE/C^2*S)K. The constant companion term, the one we have called H when our life is viewed in retrospect from a vantage of a higher dimension (i.e. after we have integrated and added together the infinite number of important moments in our lives) The constant companion is raised to a power and applied to our lives e^H is literally the laying on of hands for the gift of the Holy ghost!

We believe that man must be called of God, by prophecy. Prophecy comes by way of the TE term (the integration and approximation of dt). However, man is constrained by the speed of light term. A triffly difficult matter to overcome without the aid of God and his associates.

We believe in the same organization as the primitive church. Math is the language of the Universe, and though there is a time component in the equations upon which the church is founded, I do not believe that the equations will change over time. It is possible, and if it does my equation will enter into the realm known as dynamic systems, but as of yet equations such as that are somewhat beyond my current mathematical abilities and along with and analysis of the full generality cross product form of my equations shall have to be saved for a future date.

Ah, but what about all of the gifts, tongues, prophecies, revelations, visions, healings, interpretations and so forth, will my equations bring them forth? Yes, but the terms dealing with gifts are the products of the Holy Ghost. To bring them into play I need to use the Integral version once again. T The fullness of God's plan equals (is) the natural base e empowered with the constant companion (It seems as though the power of the Holy Ghost is throughout nature.) Applied to our nature raised to the power of faith and energy. It seems that e^F is the power of faith throughout all of nature--prophecy! So what then is the e^E term? Natural base empowered with energy--Healing! Continuing, e^(1/(C^2*S)) the natural base raised to the power of 1/all encompassing light and salvation--Revelation. And what about e^K? How is nature a part of the course of our lives? What does nature have to do with the extent of all difficulties we have over come? Perhaps the e^K term is for us to overcome our animal selves or an imploring for us to again become our perfect selves? One should also note, revelations can come to anyone, but they are strongest for those with a high degree of faith.

We believe the Bible and the book of Mormon are, as far as they are translated correctly the word of God. How does faith come about, but by knowledge I suspect those terms are tied up somehow within the all encompassing F term.

We believe all that God has revealed, all that He does now reveal, and we believe that He will yet revel many great and important things. We have seen there is a term of revelation. This term is independent of time, thus even as time goes to 0 or infinity there is still revelation. Though we will need to know more about the fine structure constant, a property possibly inherent in the universe, that will tell us if light has always been constant and always will be. That aside, consider this though, if you believe that God ever did speak to us, why would you believe that he has now gone on hiatus and is simply leaving us to his voice mail? "You're prayers are important to us, but God is not in right now. Please leave you message and God will get back to you shortly. Beep!" Sorry, no, I think I'll pass. I would much rather have a religion where God is at least as involved as I am. Thus if god is still listening, why would he also not still be revealing his infinite secrets?

Ok. How about the 10 tribes of Israel bit, and the literal gathering of Zion? Alright on that one I am stumped. I suspect it may be another one of the intricate folds inherent within F. It may even be one of those cool terms that falls out of the cross product version of this equation. Or something cool that comes out of the fact that we have an alternative composition of the speed of light. We know that c= 1/(The electric permitivity of free space times the magnetic permeability of space)^(1/2). Does this imply cool things about religion and the universe as a whole? This too I don't know I haven't perused it yet, but give me time and I will. It does mean though that space itself is on our side of the divisor bar. It also means that God is a rational term, a real term, and that there is nothing imaginary about Him, even if he is unseen. And the other cool part hidden by yet another alternative characterization, is that pi is a fundamental part of God and religion. I mentioned that there are other ways of describing the speed of light. I mentioned two constants--One of them Mu naught is the permeability of free space and is defined as 1/4Pix10^7 N/Amperes^2. But as for the tribes of Israel still no clue.

Can I show obedience to kings, presidents, rulers, and magistrates. Well obedience to them tends to improve your TL score, and Faith is exercised first, on a small scale in our rulers then on a larger scale for our God. And there is the E term, energy devoted to helping others, it seems a bit difficult to me to serve others if you yourself are locked up, though I do not think that Gandhi, or Martin Luther King Jr. were in the wrong for disobeying the laws of society. I think this Article is a general guideline. It seems to me that the most important thing is the spirit of the matter and not the specific requirements. These are after all based on the idea of love. If a law, or magistrate of any sort is not based on love then it should by all means not be followed.

So can I prove the final article? Being honest, true, chaste, benevolent, virtuous, and doing good to all? F, E and dK all speak volumes about all of those terms. Is every single one of these based on Love--Certainly. Can they all be tied back to the equations of faith, absolutely. Good night! Good Luck! Enjoy! More post to come as I think of them!

Return of the Mad-ematician Philosophizer

Equations of the Universe Part IV

When we left I had issued myself a challenge, to explore what unique mysteries could be unearthed in my equations. As a refresger, the equation we came up with last time was that S=F(G)F(S)*E*dK*T(L)/(C^2*T(E)). Where S is salvation. F(G)F(S) is a term representing our total faith, faith in God and Faith in the Son. There are some questions as to the exact nature of this term, but for now we shall leave it as either two separate terms F(S)F(G) or simply write it as one term F. E is the energy we devote to others in our thoughts, and deeds. The term dK is a measure of the things that we have overcome in life. T(L)/T(E) is the ratio of how long we live over how long we could have lived if we had followed God's plan. C^2 is the speed of light squared--a constant, albeit a very large one. Terms in hand, let us now continue our explorations of the subject at hand. We will start with a quote. A quote from the Bible itself.

"Master, which is the greatest commandment in the law? Jesus said unto him, Thous shalt love the Lord thy God with all thy heart, and with all thy soul, and with all thy mind. This is the first and great commandment. And the second is like unto it, thou shalt love thy neighbour as thyself. On these two commandmaents hang all the law and the prophets"(Matthew 22:36-40). Step one Love God with all you've got. In other words maximize F(G) and ergo you cannot love the Father and not love the son. They share the same purpose. Thus F(S)is also maximized. Regardless if F(G) and F(S) are two separate terms or one intwined term, loving God with all of your heart mind and soul is fairly well going to maximize the term. Step two, love thy neighbor as thyself e.g. you must a. love yourself, and b. love your neighbor. If you are doing this you will maximize E and dk. For the energy you devote to others is a sign of how much you love them. The energy you devote to yourself in overcoming obstacles and making your life better (dK) is evidence of a love for self. Moreover, if you love God, and yourself, it seems unlikely you will prematurely cut your life short, thus if we assume T(L)=T(E) salvation is maximized.

But there is another caveat, "on this the other commandments and profits hang". This implies that the other commandments are but special cases of this equation and should derive from it. We'll start with Exodus 20:2-7 "Thou shalt have no other Gods before me. No Graven images, and no using my name in vain either" It would appear that God doesn't want us to have a suboptimal F(G)F(S) term. Continuing in Exodus we read, "Six Days shalt thou labor, and do all thy work: But the seventh day is the sabbath..." If all of our time were devoted to God, and none to anyone else our Faith term will be maximized, but the energy term devoted to others will be 0. 0 times anything profits us nothing because didn't serve anyone else. By the same argument, if we do not have time for ourselves we cannot change dK and we end up with the same result. So, the way to have the greatest T(L), the time we have lived is to Keep god in our mind's, but to keep 6 days for ourselves and others and to devote 1 day solely to God. This means that 6Edk=F(G) and since we earlier postulated that F(G) might =C. IF this were true we could then solve for how much energy we must devote to our selves and others. But at this point an important distinction must be made F(G) is only our faith in God, and if our faith is at least equal in magnitude to that of light then we can attain salvation, but there is nothing that says it must only be equal to light. I was wrong earlier. God is not light, but created light. God is more than light. And our faith in God is not the same thing as the power of God for God is infinite, though his manifestations of his powers may be tied in to our faith in Him. If faith were allowed to be infinite instead of a fixed constant as I suspected earlier and if we also postulate backed by our equations that God's plan for us is inversely proportionate to our faith, this would explain why so many scientific discoveries quite often happen so close to each other. It would also explain why there could be only one Christ. If Christ had infinite faith this means God can assign to him infinite responsibility and have no need for a back up plan, because the probability of failure limits to zero. Whereas, us mortals have a certain faith and therefore a certain probability of following God therefore necessitating a backup plan should we choose not to follow God's will hence why so many stories sound similar, why so many inventions come about at the same time, and why so often multiple people will make the same revolutionary scientific discoveries around the same time. So we cannot say that 6EdK=C or even C^2 because F(G) and F(S) are not bounded as I had thought earlier. At the point where our actions and energies do = C^2 it implies that salvation will be light in all directions, we will be surrounded by light and yet aparently are works and energies can achieve a greatness even higher than that!

(A brief diversion if you will but allow, Why is it that we should pay tithing? Let us consider the metaphor that our talents are as the ancient parable suggests rather like money. God gave us an initial set of talents this initial investment was his principle. Now we may as we choose spend our principle. We may spend it on our selves, or we may spend our talents for the betterment of others. If we do nothing with what we are given that is when bad things happen. However, even the greatest savings account, the one of us with all of the talent in the world, if none is reinvested, it will eventually be spent. It has been said by many that paying a tithe has yielded them great benefits, if this were true this would be our means of reinvestment, and if done constantly it would be continuously compounding interest the rate of growth that is fastest. So why then should we study, go to church and possibly even serve on a mission? Because God is not only interested in increasing our pocketbooks he is interested in expanding our lives. Daily prayer, and readings of the sacred books are a daily tithe of our time and talents, Church is the weekly tithe we pay, and a mission should it so be chosen is a tithe of the premium portion of our lives. All of which will require thought not of your self, opting not to spend now in favor of more later. All are a choice, but all will yield bounteous returns.)

Honor thy Mother and Father. Is that why God Himself took the Sabath? To honor his own parents? Did an omnipotent God really need a Sabath? An infinitely powerful God, is different than an all powerful God, yet both are still Devine. Did God need the rest or was it for our benefit? These are the things I wonder. Unfortunately even my equations offer no advice upon the matter. However, they do yield insight into why we must honor our mother's and fathers. It is there I will start next time.

Yup!

You Are Fozzie Bear

"Wocka! Wocka!" You're the life of the party, and you love making people crack up. If only your routine didn't always bomb! You may find more groans than laughs, but always keep the jokes coming.

The Muppet Personality Test

quirky!

Your Quirk Factor: 78%

You're so quirky, it's hard for you to tell the difference between quirky and normal. No doubt about it, there's little about you that's "normal" or "average."

How Quirky Are You?

Silly Idealist, Librals are for kids!

Your Political Profile:

Overall: 40% Conservative, 60% Liberal Social Issues: 0% Conservative, 100% Liberal Personal Responsibility: 75% Conservative, 25% Liberal Fiscal Issues: 50% Conservative, 50% Liberal Ethics: 0% Conservative, 100% Liberal Defense and Crime: 75% Conservative, 25% Liberal

How Liberal Or Conservative Are You?

So True. I like it, though I don't think it fully encompasses my diversity because my oppinions are actually somewhat different than either choice.

They said it, not me!

You Are a Pundit Blogger!

Your blog is smart, insightful, and always a quality read. Truly appreciated by many, surpassed by only a few

What Kind of Blogger Are You?

Blue=

What Your Favorite Color Blue Says About You:

Emotional --- Affected --- Sensitive Peaceful --- Tranquil --- Connected Spiritual --- Experimental --- Deep

What Does Your Favorite Color Say About You?

Love is blind...

But friendship closes its eyes.

And I shall Call Him Cream Cheese!

You Should Own a Beagle

Low maintenance, very friendly, and sturdy.

What Kind of Dog Should You Have?

um ok I'll keep that in mind.

Your Anti Climactic Fortune

Deep into your future, I forsee: A bad case of food poisoning

The Anti Climactic Fortune Teller

;|

You Are 52% Weirdo

You're definitely quite strange, but you can act like a normal person when you have to. (But just because you can act normally, it certainly doesn't mean you want to!) You have normal aspects to your personality... but you usually don't choose to emphasize them.

Are You A Weirdo?

I love It!

You Are an Alien

You're so strange, people occasionally wonder if you're from another world. You don't try to be different, but you see most things from a very unique, very offbeat perspective. Brilliant to the point of genius, you definitely have some advanced intelligence going on. No matter what circles you travel in, you always feel like a stranger. And it's a feeling you've learned to like. Your greatest power: Your superhuman brain Your greatest weakness: Your lack of empathy - you just don't get humans You play well with: Zombies

What Kind of Monster Are You?

They need a question about Warshing Machines

Your Linguistic Profile:

70% General American English 20% Upper Midwestern 5% Yankee 0% Dixie 0% Midwestern

What Kind of American English Do You Speak?

And this too...

You Have Good Karma

In general, you like to do the right thing when it comes to others. Your caring personality really shines through. Sure, you have your moments of weakness - and occasionally act out. But, all in all, you're karma is good... even with those few dark spots.

How's Your Karma?

And this one

You Are the Super Ego

While some people may think first and act later... you often don't act at all. You rather be safe than sorry, and you take ethics pretty seriously. Like everyone, you have some pretty crazy desires. But unlike everyone, you restrain yourself. You have high standards for your own behavior. And you happily exceed them.

Are You Id, Ego, or Superego?

And The Winner Is...

You Are Big Bird

Talented, smart, and friendly... you're also one of the sanest people around. You are usually feeling: Happy. From riding a unicycle to writing poetry, you have plenty of hobbies to keep you busy. You are famous for: Being a friend to everyone. Even the grumpiest person gets along with you. How you life your life: Joyfully. "Super. Duper. Flooper."

The Sesame Street Personality Quiz

I suspect...

I suspect that this is an urban legend, but it funny nonetheless. Almost as funny as the electric wheel chair with hydraulics I saw in Indianapolis.

Ah vegetables to my ears.

And now for your daily dose of music done in the key of celery flat.

And here's a car to go with it!!

Now that's a 0-60 3.4 sec. 6.5 L 211 mph car!

Now That's a Car Crash!!

O.O

Part the Fifth

Now we have seen that much can be gleaned from the equation of faith. We have shown that faith itself has a term in this equation (actually more correctly we have shown that the relationship of our faith to the supreme deity's faith and the faith in His son has a term), but can we show all faith comes from this same source? The next few posts will be my attempts at just that.

To start we'll explore my own faith, the LDS faith. What does it mean to be a member of the LDS church? Here we will take a brief detour and I will give the answer I gave in church:

"What does it mean to be LDS. This is an enormously broad topic to discuss.
How does one even start to approach this. Well fortunately we are
given guidance in this matter, published on October 6th 1890 is the
document that outlines what it means to be a member of the LDS church.
It begins with "we." We is the the first person plural pronoun.
What this implies is that each one of us has come to this church for
our own reasons. We have all had our own experiences. Our our trials
and tribulations, but WE have all come to the same conclusion
together. What does it mean to be a member, a member of a club, a
member of a gang, a member of a family, and finally a member of the
church? It means to belong to, to be accepted. It means to be loved
and welcomed, which brings me to my next point. We Believe, belief is
knowing without seeing, knowing God the eternal father. THE eternal
father, there is only one. He is our father and like any good parent
in his eyes we ARE accepted, loved appreaciated and welcomed now and
for all time, for he is eternal without begining and without end. We
believe in God, the eternal father, and in his son Jesus Christ. We
believe that he died for us, that he is the pathway back to salvation,
the guiding light should we err. We believe that men shall be judged
for their own sins and not the transgressions of Adam. What does this
mean? It means that we have the best of both worlds. Adam had to
take the bite of the apple for man to know what sin was--this suggests
a plan, devine guidance. But, we are "graded" on our own sins
suggesting that we have free will. We are allowed to choose, to make
our own sins upon which we are to be judged. We are not merely the
pawns of some all powerful controlling being's game, we are children
of god, guided by our maker but allowed to choose our path. We
believe in the atonement of Christ. One man divided by zero sin, an
infinite sacrifice, an infinite sacrifice given freely for us. Christ
is not the well for our sins, for any reservoir, no matter how large,
if only filled and never emptied will one day overflow, Christ did not
store our sines, but rather he destroyed them. In his death because
he was untainted by sin he has freed us from our bonds. Whatsmore,
this ultimate gift would not be nearly so powerful if Christ were
naught but a God, for it would be easy for a God to overcome anything
that was thrown at him, but Christ was a mortal, feeble like us.
Suffering like we have, it was this property that made his sacrifice
so great. But what does all of it mean if we do not believe in him
our redeemer? If we do not believe then his death was without
purpose. Second only to faith in Christ is repentance, verily he
spoke unto us saying "Repent and sin no more!" For repentance is as
Elder Russel Nielson said in his Spring 2007 General Conference address,
"when Christ uttered these words they were recorded as the Greek
phrase Metanoeos coming from the root words of meta meaning a change,
pneuma meaning breathe, gnosis, knowledge, Neuma spirit, Taken
together this was an imperative for us, when we repent to experience a
change in our mind, body, knowldege, breath and spirit." This is no
light charge, and indeed none would be expected from the man who died
for our sins.
The Articles of Faith continue by saying that they believe in men
being ordained by profesey by the laying on of hands and by the
complete baptism by immersion. Indeed, baptism comes from the Greek
word of the same name meaning to dip or imerse. In the bible
dictionary it says that baptism by any other means is not a baptism.
Indeed if we claim to be followers of Christ then we must do as he has
done. In the book of John Chapters 1-3 the story of Christ's
immersion is told. If prophesy is of no consequence, why then does
the entirety of the Old testament set the stage for Christ to come?
If the laying on of hands are of no import why then does Christ
himself lay his hands upon the heads of each of his apostles in his
last moments during the last supper? If personal revelation and
responsibility are not an important part of this church why did Christ
and the father themselves descend upon Joseph Smith? Nay I say these
things are of the utmost importance. Now there are many more things I
could go into on what it means to be a member of the LDS church, but
alas, my time draws short. There are still 7 Articles yet to be
discussed, but sadly these shall have to be the venues of yet another
discussion, though there is one last thing I would like to leave you
with today. I would like you all to note the name at the very end of
the passage. Joseph Smith. I believe him to be a prophet and
enlighted seeer of the world the way it is. Let us, for the sake of
argument, assume that he is wrong. Tell me even in error, how many
1000+ page books printed in over 100 languages and countries around
the world have you published? How many 13 million member religions,
have you with high school and college educations started recently?
How many Harvard, Standford, and Yale graduates have you convinced,
how many papers have you published that can withstand 200 years of
scientific scrutiny the world over? I dare say, that even if he is
wrong, this man is one of the most influential people in history. And
if it were all a lie, why should he standby this lie even unto death?
Truly he has the marks of an enlightened man. I believe these things
are true, I cannot doubt their veracity. These things I say in
Jesus's name. Amen!"

So, can any of these things be found within my equations? And what about those other 7 articles, they are clearly part of the creed of what it means to be a Latter Day Saint, but what are my opinions of them? Stay tuned we'll see.

Part IV

When we last left this mortal solenoid, we had solved for everything except faith. Let us now explore the ramifications of solving for F(G)and F(S). F(g)=(S*C^2TE)/(F(S)EdkTL), F(S)=(S*C^2TE)/(F(G)EdkTL). Wait what? How can this be a stronger faith in Christ reduces our faith in God. The more things we overcome, and the more energy we devote to others all suggest a diminished faith in the divine. Even if we take into account the fact that Faith in Christ is related to faith in God and treating faith as one term F(G)F(S)=S*C^2/EdkTL we are still left with a paradox. Why should an increase of the energy invested on our part represent a decrease in our total faith. At first glimpse our equation clearly shows an inconsistency, yet given the staggering, awe inspiring predictions I am loath to cast it aside as of yet. Further study reveals that the paradox is resolved by realizing faith has crossed the barrier of the equals sign. Our faith is being viewed from a cosmic perspective. From the vantage of God and Christ all of our actions all of our trials amount to what appears to be very little. This is simply a reaffirmation that faith cannot be gained through energy works but must be gained independent of our energies and trials. However, this is still only marginally satisfying. If works do not increase faith, why then do so many religions insist on service in a mission? Why then have so many who have served testify to the opposite of this claim. Perhaps, our equation has a glitch. What if the terms F(G) and F(S) are not faith in God and Christ as I have thought, but what if it is instead the ratio of our faith, to the faith in God and the Son. My faith is F(M). Yet how many times greater is the faith of God and Christ? Faith enough to die for the entire world and never call unto him the powers of heaven to prevent it. 1/A great expanse of faith that is God and Christ neither separated from the other F(M)/F(G)F(S)=TLdkE/(S*C^2TE) And now the light is upon us for the greatest way of increasing the ratio of our faith to the faith of God and Christ is through an energy of devotion, love, endeavoring to change and to live our fullest life.

There is one other powerful point to be made. When derived, this equation was based on the idea that work is equal to force times distance, this is true, but it is not the most general form. In its broadest form work is defined as Force Cross Distance. Our cross is a product of the net force and total distance traveled in ALL directions and all dimensions. What wonders will we derive if instead of using the classic particulate force, but instead the electroweak, The nuclear strong, Coulomb's law and the many other functions of compulsion.

Just as a fork if seen from one vantage appears as but three separate dots, from another it is a single line segment, from a third it is a highly filigreed, ornate handle. Each of these views contradicts the others for clearly something that is three separate tines cannot be a single line, but viewed from an all seeing higher realm it is something more proving all three all three sights to be a true part of the whole. So too do I view religions. Perhaps with a better understanding of not only the cross product of our forces and their distances but work when viewed from every direction, perhaps then truth and understanding among religions will ensue.

Equations of the Universe Part III

If you recall, when we last met, I had derived for you a relation that went something like this. Salvation is equal to the product of Faith in God, Faith in the Son, Energy devoted to others, Obstacles overcome, and Time lived. All divided by the product of C^2 times the expected amount of time that you should live, or in math speak S=(F(G)F(S)*E*TL dK)/(C2*TE). The true sign that I am either off my rocker on really on to something is that it has generated a lot of
very concerned messages. Some interesting points that have been brought up are: "How do you know that your terms are really constants and not functions?", "Yes, your numbers are nice, but how do you know that's what the universe is really doing?", "There are other definitions for force, mass, time, etc how do you know you have substituted in the right ones?" and the list goes on. The answer to all of these is that I don't know. But an interesting test of any good mathematical equation is to see what it predicts. Here now are some of the predictions of the equation I have coined.

It has been said, that the greatest of the commandments is love. Love thy God with thy heart mind and soul. Love thy neighbor as thyself. Any equation propounding to be one of faith should have an expression for this. Does mine? Yes. The S term comes from a derivation of the
impact of something. This particular impact is the impact of love. For Faith is synonymous with love thus F(G)F(S) (Faith in God and Faith in the Son) show up as love. Energy devoted to others = love for them. dkTL the change in course times the time lived represents a
respect of self and a desire to overcome and to endure. A desire to live to the end. Love.

Now suppose instead of Salvation being the solution, what would happen if we solved instead for the energy spent. E=S*C^2*TE/F(G)*F(S)*TL*dk In other words, The Energy of helping other people is a form of salvation, it provides great light. And if TE the time we are
expected here on this Earth might be substituted as a divine plan then helping someone else is part of this plan. But as this equation points out Helping someone else will take time. The less time you know someone the more energy it will take to help them. Energy devoted to others will cause change, though interestingly the smaller the change the greater the energy it will take. Large changes can be done easily, but small ones become progressively harder. And if there
is nothing that needs to be changed, then an infinite amount of energy is released. Consider this, God is perfect, there is nothing about him that is in need of change and thus according to our relation, his energy must be infinite. Moreover, helping others not only is a part of God's plan, a part of his being, but also an act of faith. And the greater your faith in both God and Christ the less energy it will take to help another. If your faith is low, then helping others becomes very difficult and much energy must be invested. There is one other important feature of this particular rendition. The astute reader should note that all things that are controlled by God are on one side of the dividing line, while all things that are under our control are under God's watchful eye and are separated by a thin dividing line. A line has no width God is infinitely close to us 0 distance away 0 thickness is the line of the boundary that separates us from Him. Yet, This line, this veil if you will is still quite difficult for us to cross of our own. Moreover the energy we devote to others is on the same level as God himself! Hmm. Fascinating.

What can we learn if instead we solve for our change in course? dk=S*C^2*TE/(F(G)F(S)*E*TL) The things we overcome are essential to salvation. They will provide us will light. They are part of TE--the great plan. Failure to change is why Satan's plan failed. There is no room to change and to grow. The greater our faith the smaller our choices will be, the easier they will become. The more we help others, the smaller our choices become. And as our life progresses on so do do our choices become clearer. If what the LDS church, the
church I have so recently joined, if what they say is true, and I believe it is, this would suggest that Salvation is probably one of several constants. My faith tells me that there are 3 levels of
heaven, yet heaven for you, will be just as rewarding as heaven for me. This suggests the possibility that heaven is quantized. Somewhat particulate, yet also continous revealing both a wave and particle like nature. It is constant and existing as a distinct value. Goodness and Light, light squared too is a constant. TE I suspect is also a constant, though the idea
that it is a function is intriguing as well, but all of this means that change is not constant as the old adage goes, but it is nearly so. Change depends upon our faith, our energy , and our choices,
change is almost entirely in our hands!

TE and TL are too inseparable terms. Why are we here if we are not a part of God's plan? So too why should so many cultures have a God if something of the sort were not supposed to be in our life? TL The life we live is S, Salvation, C^2, light, light in all we can see, TE, a part of God's plan/Faiths Energies and changes (dk) So too is our life. If we are separated from God's plan, then we will be divided by differing faiths, energy and change. Life it appears is a very interesting function. Salvation as suggested earlier, I believe to be on. C^2 is a constant. Faith and Energy are in my hands. Change is tricky. I have control, but probably not all. And thus, taken as a whole, my life is not entirely in my hands, but it is for the most part under my control. Life is a symbiosis, a symbiosis of free will. I am a stake holder in
the changes of it and in my faith. I may choose the amount of energy to devote, but it is also a product of a divine plan. But remember TL and TE are coupled. TE=F(G)F(S)E*dK*TL/(C^2*S). How long we live, our expected life span and how it fits into the cosmic scheme cannot decrease except by our choising TL. The Greater our faith and the more we devote to others from an eternal perspective the longer our lives will be. So how should we maximize the ratio of how long we are expected to live to how long we actually live? Our fullest life TE/TL=F(G)F(S)*E*dk/S*C^2. Thus the key to not only salvation, but to living our longest possible life is to life one full of Faith and Love. To strive to overcome that which is thrown at us and to always mindful of that which is good and and light and to keep our own salvation underfoot--Hmm Calvinism has reared its head. While we are on the topic of the course of our lives unbeknownst to us our equation has hidden another expression for the length of our lives. To see the full beauty of this equation let us again examine it in its original form. S=F(G)F(S)*E*TL*dk/C^2 TE but if you will remember TE came from the acceleration term in work. Acceleration was defined as dk/dt where we proposed that dt was the change in time and therefore equal to time, though this generalization is correct, let us see what happens if we did this equation its full justice and integrated it properly. Separating like terms we are now left with dt/TL = (F(G)F(S)*E/S*C^2)dk, you will recognize this as a fancier version of the equation we had before. Here we will converse with God in his native tongue, mathematics. Now one should note, that it was pointed out earlier our faith in God and Christ is probably more accurately described by a function of k; however, I have not yet been granted privy to this precise function I will deal only in the simplest case--F(G)and F(S) as constants. If this is true we are able to antidifferentiate with respect to time, a neutral time outside of our life or God's. Doing so, the veil is lifted slightly and we are left with The natural logarithm of Time=(F*E/S*C^2)K + a constant. Hmm, time has a natural rhythm, there is an algorithm, a plan for our life. Our total faith, and our total energies divided among a constant of all encompassing light and salvation times all of the things we have over come K. It takes an entire lifetime to overcome all that we can, thus K=TL. Notice K has no limits. We may never be able to completely overcome all things, but we are a source of infinite potential (Proof of this forthcoming.) The other thing that is amazing is now that we are on the other side, in a higher dimension, our life is summed totaled and complete we realize that hidden this entire time has been a constant. What is this higher dimensional constant companion you ask? There is but one thing it can be--the Holy Ghost. Ah good, and now our Trinity is complete. This leaves only three things to solve for. The speed of light squared is a fundamental part of our equations. This means that we can solve for goodness and light a supposed constant in terms of functions, functions not of God's control, but of ours! Our choices can affect the entirety of the rest of the universe! Michaelson and Morely have shown quite conclusively that the speed of light is indeed constant for all points and observers. Something has to change, but what? Einstein has fortunately provided us with the answer to this one. Space distances and time itself will change to preserve the sanctity of goodness and light. This means that every Joule of of energy we devote to someone else brings time to a stop distances mean nothing god is among us, and because time has stopped we have gained an eternity all dependent on us overcoming our sins, helping others, and keeping a strong faith in God and Christ!

And the homerun for weirdness, goes to...

Her.

Strike Three and the Irony is Out!

Read this one carefully. Its the name of the store that makes the heist so great.

And the Irony Strikes Again

So on one paper I was both marked down for doing too little, and too much? Can anyone say "Law of Averages" not holding?

The Irony

So please let me know if anyone else finds this ironic. The WSU Underground, a club devoted to secrecy and subterfuge, is now announcing their December social.

Word Yo!

Friends, Romans, Hipsters,
Let me clue you in;
I come to put down Caesar, not to groove him.
The square kicks some cats are on stay with them;
The hip bits, like, go down under; so let it lay with Caesar.  The cool Brutus
Gave you the message: Caesar had big eyes;
If that's the sound, someone's copping a plea,
And, like, old Caesar really set them straight.
Here, copacetic with Brutus and the studs, -- for Brutus is a real cool cat;
So are they all, all cool cats, --
Come I to make this gig at Caesar's laying down.

Courtesy Macgyver.com

Blink Blink Blink

Somewhat funny this is.

Well that didn't end well...

This man's death is a terrible tragedy. My condolences to his family. Yet still, the irony gets me.

God-1 Georgia-0

http://news.yahoo.com/s/ap/20071115/ap_on_re_us/southern_drought_1

Quandries...

A challenge was issued. Battle lines were drawn, but tonight a winner will be decided. In an all out battle royale we have in the blue corner, The Unstoppable Force! His foe, the undefeated adversary, in the red corner is the challenger, The Immovable Object. Who will win? Stay tuned as they proceed to duke it out. But first, some definitions of terms. As we know, force is equal to mass times acceleration. F=Ma. If we break out the calculus this turns into F=mdv/dt or the change in velocity over the change in time. An unstoppable object translates into an object with infinite force. Meanwhile though, we have the immotile object meaning it has an infinite amount of inertia. Inertia is a property of mass, as such momentum is a decent approximation of said inertness. Where, momentum is defined as the mass times the velocity P=mV. Ah, two infinities colliding to produce any of several different possibilities: If the force is the larger of the two countable infinities then the wall will move; if however, the wall has a greater amount of inertia than the force can act upon then the force will not only stop, but it will change directions as well. It is possible that both could annihilate each other or that they will equal each other, in that the immovable wall will not move nor will the force cease it will simply have encountered its equal. The force may simply change directions going around the wall, or possibly through it. DING! And there’s the bell, our prefight match up has ended and the two have collided (To officially answer the question we will need to know about the nature of the collision, is it completely elastic, entirely inelastic or a combination of something in between, but fear not for I have some tricks up my sleeve yet.)! What does it mean for a wall to be immovable since we are measuring its momentum it must have a velocity of 0, otherwise it would be moving, but if it has infinite momentum it must have an infinite mass(we’ll play with the prerequisite calculus necessary to deal with 0x∞ in a bit.). To be unstoppable what must an unstoppable force have? It must have either/ both an infinite mass or an infinite acceleration. If it has an infinite mass and at least some acceleration then one would suspect that because it has two terms whereas the wall has only one that the force should trump the wall, however, this is not the nature of infinities. Though it is true that one infinity can be much larger than another (You should read Cantor and his seating paradox to really get this one.), it may not be true that just because force has two infinite terms while momentum has but one, that the force is stronger. The other alternative is interesting though, if instead of infinite mass, the unstoppable force has an infinite acceleration this means it must change velocity in zero seconds which means it is not really in this universe since time and distance are related if the force exists outside of time it exists out side of this universe—which has interesting side applications for religion, but we shan’t venture into these just yet. So what do we do? We collide the force with the momentum. F/dv/dt=m è P= (F/dv/dt)V. We have solved force for the mass and replaced the momentum term with said force. Hmmm, it appears as though masses are not the solution to our problem, as in this instance they have both canceled. For kicks let’s see what happens if we solve for velocity. If you haven’t had calculus, panic! If you have, no sweat we’ll just separate the equation and we find we are left with dV/V=(F/P)dt. If you haven’t had training in the tools of Leibnitz and Newton, what we are going to next is smash the thing to itty-bitty tinsy tiny parts and then add them all back together. When we do this we are left with LnV=(F/P)T +C. Where C is our initial velocity, but since the wall by definition was not moving we are safe to say c=0 Taking the inverse log we are left with V=e^(F/P)t which in and of its self is pretty cool. It means that given time force and momentum you can solve for velocity. But let us continue our sadism one step further let us instead solve for position, recalling that v=dx/dt è dx= e^(F/P)tdt. Pulling our favorite trick of integrating the crap out of it again (for the non math geeks who have actually stuck with it this far integrating is the trick we pulled where we smashed it into bits and added up all of the broken bits), we are left with x = (P/F)e^(F/P)t+C Hmmm, that pesky C popped in again, but fear not, for we are crafty theoreticians and are prepared for just such an unfortunate event. Based on careful prior planning we have placed our wall exactly on a spot we have called 0. Ho, ho, luck is with us for c=0 yet again. Woot! (It is important to note that in this instance C refers not to the speed of light, but to some unknown constant. Letting it equal 0 is perfectly acceptable for our purposes.) Ok, now for the fun stuff. Let’s see what happens when we let both force and momentum go off to infinity. If x goes negative the force wins as the wall will have been pushed back. If x goes positive it means the wall will force back the force. If it stays zero, its hard to tell whether the force pushes the wall equally, or if both are destroyed. If x goes to infinity the force won. And now for the moment of truth, we let both F and P limit to infinity and what do we get? (We should also note that the force and the wall are opposing each other and should therefore be opposite in sign from each other.) ( -∞/∞)e^(∞/∞)t . This is clearly undefined, resume panicking! Oh yeah, we have L’Hospital’s Rule e^-∞ = 0 so if P/F goes to infinity the value is still undefined, if it goes to any finite value then its still 0. So dP/dF= -1/1=-1,- 1x0=0 The wall wins! The unstoppable force has been either stopped or destroyed. The wall having only mass to go on beat the multiple valued unstoppable force! Though, sadly we know the position of the wall so well we can longer be certain if it has a momentum, it may have destroyed itself stopping the force, though Ladies and Gentlemen, it has been done, the force has been stopped.

Something to think about...

All the taxes paid over a lifetime by the average American
are spent by the government in less than a second.
 -- Jim Fiebig

Please Note...

This is NOT how you change a tire!

The phsyics of Skydiving

So many of you know I went skydiving some weeks ago, today I was thinking of it again and decided to crunch some numbers on the physics of skydiving. The plane has a land speed velocity of roughly 500 mph (223.5 m/s) at t=0 I fall out of the plane cruzing at 13,000 feet. After 5.7 seconds I am traveling 125 mph (55.88m/s) In those 5 seconds I have dropped 316 m and seen the plane cover a distance of just under half a mile. For the next 43.4 seconds I am weightless but experiencing a 2,000 pascal wind pushing on me. 1728 pounds of pressure are exerted over my body every inch though it doesn't seem like much is pushed with 2 ounces of thrust. In one second I will displace approximately 62 cubic meters of air.After nearly a minute of falling the 'chute opens and in a span of 3 seconds or so an additional 1,600 newtons kick you back up. In 3 seconds you decelerate from 125 miles per hour to just over 7. The decceleration is -1.78 times the acceleration due to gravity. Given that the parachuting pilot has a sadistic sense of glea, the next 10 s are spent in a madhouse stomach churning spin pulling 21,600 degrees per minute 2Pi rad/s 560 newtons a spin. Soon after your stomach returns to its initial position and the remaining 320 s are spent wondering how on Earth are you going to relieve an 890 newton harness wedgie. With 20 or so seconds left you begin to see the ground, it looks so nice and welcoming, you think to yourself that solid ground never looked quite so beautiful natural instinct kicks in your feet extend you are ready to walk home, but what you fail to realize after trying so hard to avoid that powerpole and radio antenna, is that when you set out to walk on lovely terrafied firma you will collide with her with a force of nearly 200 newtons. This hurts and is not strongly recomended. My personal suggestion is to increase your impulse time to something on the order of 5 or so seconds reducing the bone jaring impact to a mere lollup from a kitty cat on steroids. Resuming landing on the ground it then takes approximately 5.8 weeks to realize the extent of what just happened and how amaziningly cool that was!

Blogs that aren't me

So today's post is inspired by the fact that I couldn't type my own address and as a result found a whole lot of blogs that aren't me. So for your viewing pleasure, none of these are mine:

http://booms.kir.jp/

http://boomsblog.blogpsot.com/

http://boomblog.blogspot.com/

http://www.johnboom.nl/default.asp

http://www.johnjohnboom.com/page7.html

http://www.boom.nl/historie.php

http://www.boomboomblues.com/

Wow!

Cool.