Random findings from Macgyver.com

From the moment I picked your book up until I put it down I was
convulsed with laughter.  Some day I intend reading it.
  -- Groucho Marx, from "The Book of Insults"

Conversation, n.:
 A vocal competition in which the one who is catching his breath
is called the listener.

There are no physicists in the hottest parts of hell, because the
existence of a "hottest part" implies a temperature difference, and any
marginally competent physicist would immediately use this to run a heat
engine and make some other part of hell comfortably cool.  This is
obviously impossible.
    -- Richard Davisson

You need only reflect that one of the best ways to get yourself a
reputation as a dangerous citizen these days is to go about repeating
the very phrases which our founding fathers used in the struggle for
independence.
  -- Charles A. Beard

The marvels of today's modern technology include the development of a
soda can, when discarded will last forever ... and a $7,000 car which
when properly cared for will rust out in two or three years.

I doubt, therefore I might be.

"I do not feel obliged to believe that the same God who has endowed us
with sense, reason, and intellect has intended us to forego their use."
  -- Galileo Galilei


And one from http://www.flickriver.com/groups/71332142@N00/pool/