Monday, September 25, 2006

Bag to basics

My hypothesis is than in under 2 hours I can write 101 jokes on any
subject. The subject i have chosen is bags. The time is 10:40:30

For Sacks and Baggles (101 Really Bag Jokes)

1-6.What are some geographic places relating to bags?
Bagistan
Packistan
sackinaw MI
hackenSack NY
Bagdad
bagaria

7. how do you pay homage to the bag gods?
You sack-rifice to them

8.What are the holy bag writings?
The bag-avhad ghita

9.What is a book about the adventures of a sack?
The Hobbit he is after all a sackville Baggins

10.Who did the sack man marry?
The bag lady

11.What do french sacks eat?
Bag-ettes

12.What do scottish sacks play?
The bag pipes

13. What esle might a bag play?
A tenor sacks

14.What do you call a sweet bag?
Sackrine

15.What do bag football players call it when they gett hit?
They were sacked

16. When was Rome in a bag?
1453 it was sacked

17. What game to you play with a bean BAG?
hacky sack

18. What do you call something holy in bag land?
Sackred

19. How do you express dismay in the pariesian realm of bag land?
Sack le bleu

20. Who was a famous marine biologist from bagland?
sack Crusteau

21. What did the bag microbiologist discover?
A new strain of bag-teria

22. Why are all of the jokes about bags so short?
because they are sacksinct

23.Why was the sack baseball player safe?
He was standing on the bag

24. What is a fun game among young bags?
Sacker

25.Why did the bag go far in life?
He was sackcessful

26.What do you call a rodent in bag land?
a pack rat

27.What is the largest organism on bag land?
a packyderm (elephant)

28. Who is a mythological hero of bagland?
Purse ius

29. What geologic bag feature is in south dakota?
The bag lands

30. Who was a famous sacktor?
Humpfrey Bagart

31. What happened after the sack went hunting?
He bagged him a deer

32. What do you call a chase on bagland?
A purseuit (pursuit)

33. What are the denizens of bagland known as?
they are just ordinary purseons

34.What do bag land artists draw with?
Pursepective

35. What do you call a poor wander of bagland?
a bagavond

36. What else might you call them?
A bagger

37. what do the citizens of bagland eat?
Bagels

38.Are the people of bagland pious?
No they are sack religious

39. What is the favorite game of baglanders?
Pack man

40. Who makes all the computers in bagland?
Hewlett Packard

41.What do you call a bag afraid of spiders?
Packnaphobia

42.Who is the panther on the bag version of the jungle book?
bageira

43. What is the most popular type of clothing for sacks?
Anything baggy

44. Who are the pets in bagland?
doggy bags

45. What is the favorite song of bagland?
bag to the bone

46.If someone wins a contest in bagland what do they get?
bagging rights

47. What is the largest neuron is a sacks body?
The bagus nerve

48. What is a disorder common in bagland?
Tae sacks disease

49. Where can sacks go to gamble?
Las bagus

50. How much is 13 in bagland?
A bagus dozen

51. What type of camels are in bagland?
bagtrian

52. What happens when you do not make any progress in bagland?
You bag-track

53.Why are felines so unpopular in sackville?
Because the cat is always out of the bag

54. How do sackville fishermen boast?
It was this bag...

55. What do you call a flying bag lizard?
A pterasackdyl

56.Who is the chief of bag land?
Allowat sackima (inside joke)

57. What do bag go as for halloween?
Count Sackula

58.What is the favorite animal on bag land?
The kangaroo, its got a built in pouch

59. what do you call a lazy bag?
A pouch potato

60. who are the famous french puppet duo of bagland?
Pouch and Judy

61. What is illegal on the game preseves of bagland?
Pouching

62.When do light beep on bagland trucks?
When they are bagging up

63.When are buttons/bags sad?
When they are de-pressed

64. Hey not all of my jokes are bag some are purse!

65. How do bags converse?
They can't bags don't talk

66. What is the flying sack horse?
bagasus

67. Who composed more bagland operas than anyone else?
Pouchini

68.What do you call juicy bags?
sackulent

69. What is it called when a bag goes to sleep?
Hitting the sack

70.What is the biggest pest in sackville?
A fleabag

71. In what do sackville farmers grow their crops?
A dirt bag

72. What do you call something unclear in sackville?
Bag (vague)

73. What is the favorite author in bagland?
balsack (balzac)

74.If you don't come in first in bagland where do you place?
sackond

75.What do you call a racist sack?
a bagot

76.what do you call a pile of sacks?
a bagott

77. What do you call bag humor?
sacktire

78. What dance is popular in sackville/
The baguine

79. Why do things never get done in sackville?
You can't finish if you don't bagin

80.What is it called when you can see far in bagland?
Pursepicacious

81. Which baglander discovered Pluto?
Purseival lowell

82. Who is a famous knight in bagland?
Sir Purseval

83. What do you call theoretical baglike partikles that go back in
time and create themselves?
Sackyons

84. What do sackvillers breathe?
Air bags

85.What do you call a sackville swamp?
A peat bag (bog)

86.How do bags reproduce?
sacks (SORRY!!)

87. What do you call a tune sung in sackville?
a didie

1 hour

88.Who is a famous baseball player in bagland?
satchel paige

I apologize in advance for the next few if you take offense

89.What do you call an old lady on a horse?
a saddlebag

90.Old ladies in a store?
shopping bags

91.Sleeping under lots of your letters after h?
Bags under your "i"s

92.Where do bags rest?
in a knapsack

93. What do you call it when you make arrowheads out of bags?
a knapsack

94. Two bags collided it was quite a nasty ruck

95.Why are purses so self concientious?
They are afraid of reticule (type of bag)

96.where in a bag's brain does name recognition take place?
In the Reticule-ar formation

97.What is it called when one bag forgives another?
Letting bagones be bagones (By gones)

98.What do sacks eat?
bagged lunches

99.If you stop assuming the truth of sacks, have you bagged the question

FYI
A sack is a whine from the Canary islands
A saque is a loose fiting child's garmet

100. What do bags say when its really cold?
Burrr-lap

And Finally...

101. If I keep telling these bad jokes, what is likely to happen?
I will get sacked.

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